Sorry, y'all, the "Yes Mama" is taking a beating today, just had to get that off my chest.
20 hours ago
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Can I get an amen?
If you leave a message on my answering machine and I do not know you, yet you want me to call you back, YOU BETTER LEAVE YOUR PHONE NUMBER.
Sorry, y'all, the "Yes Mama" is taking a beating today, just had to get that off my chest.
Sorry, y'all, the "Yes Mama" is taking a beating today, just had to get that off my chest.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Drinking Kool-Aid, Beer, and Shopping!
There's been lots on my mind lately. In order to get it cleaned out a bit, I am sharing some random bits with you ~ you'll be rewarded because I'm saving the best for last on this post!
I'm sipping a Mission St. Blonde Ale right now. LOVIN' IT! :)
Along with my Blonde Ale, I'm shopping for diapers at diapers.com. I see that diapers.com has begun selling their own brand of diapers. I'm trying to decide if I should order them for Dallas, and what size. I'm reading the reviews and holy hot dogs!!! I can't believe how many people are passionate about the designs on the diapers their kids wear and when/if the designs show through their clothes. Here's a NEWSFLASH, moms and dads! We all know that your precious bundle is wearing a diaper, whether or not we can see the designs. I love diapers.com for their customer service, amazingly fast, free shipping (free on orders over $49), AND my boxes of goodies are lugged to my front door by someone else! (BTW if I have convinced you to order from diapers.com ~ use my email address on your first order for $10 off! handcuffed.heart@yahoo.com)
If you're a mom, you know what it means to work hard when you have young kids ~ even if that "work" doesn't bring about anything particularly tangible at the end of the day. If you're a LEO wife with kids (especially those small ones!), not only are you working hard as a mom, you are also working long, odd hours "alone," and that's just the tip of the iceberg for us. For a while now -- actually, since Dallas was born 10 months ago -- I've watched myself get more and more frustrated, "stressed out" (whatever that means), and the biggest, visible change: I'm angry. I have a short fuse. I want my kids to behave, obey, and I want them to do it right away. Sometimes unreasonably so. While obedience is an important trait to groom in children (for it's far reaching effects in many other ways), being unreasonable about expecting their obedience is not helpful. This is not atypical for police parents -- you work all day expecting people to give you what you want, when you want, and comply PERIOD -- so this expectation trickles down to home life as well. I'm not the police parent in our family, but I've definitely been creeping towards the unreasonable end of the spectrum over the last 10 months. I don't remember EVER yelling this much in my entire life, if ever. (I'm the one always telling my husband to pipe down when we're arguing. I don't "do" yelling during fights!) Quite simply, I do not like who I have become as a mom of three.
I've really been struggling with this lately. I miss my old life. I miss being single, wearing my cute, small(er) sized clothes and shoes, working at a job that has a tangible product produced at the end of the day... I miss going to bed and waking up whenever I feel like it. I miss hanging out with my friends and going to fancy restaurants without a bunch of hullabaloo of schedule coordinating and babysitter arrangements. And when I think about how much I dislike who I have become, I miss all these things even more. Then I remember that it wasn't all a bed of roses back then, either!
So what's a girl to do?? While I miss my old life, it doesn't mean I necessarily dislike my current life. My life is challenging now, but they are different challenges than those I experienced "PK" (pre-kids). I'm being required to grow and change and stretch in ways I never was PK. I have three adorable children who worship and love me (yes, I know this will change soon enough).
So I've decided I want to drink the Kool-Aid. I want to be a "yes" woman. What am I talking about, you ask?? The longer my husband is at his department the more officers he sees promote and "drink the Kool-Aid." They become "yes" men (or women) and the things that they formerly railed against, they begin siding with the brass on. What's wrong with me doing the same? Every time my child asks for something, I want to say "yes." I'm slowing relegating Mean Momma to the netherworld and saying YES. Don't misunderstand: I will still be one of the strictest mommas I know; I have my limits. I have boundaries, expectations, and hopefully patience. Being a YES woman is a state of mind. Stuck in line at Costco (like tonight)? It sure went a lot faster because I was playing with and chatting with the three kids and not so incredibly angry (like I wanted to be!) that the checker was incompetent, slow, and chatty with his coworkers. The kids want to eat breakfast in bed? Ok, YES, we will pick ONE DAY this week when you can do that ~ we will plan the (non-messy) menu and look forward to it all week. Everyone's happy! I said yes but I have my limits. :)
I don't want these precious, precious years with my little ones to slip by while I'm mired in anger, impatience, and totally depressed about my "horrible" life. I want to treasure what I have, while I have it. I hope you will join me and say "YES" with me.
I'm sipping a Mission St. Blonde Ale right now. LOVIN' IT! :)
Along with my Blonde Ale, I'm shopping for diapers at diapers.com. I see that diapers.com has begun selling their own brand of diapers. I'm trying to decide if I should order them for Dallas, and what size. I'm reading the reviews and holy hot dogs!!! I can't believe how many people are passionate about the designs on the diapers their kids wear and when/if the designs show through their clothes. Here's a NEWSFLASH, moms and dads! We all know that your precious bundle is wearing a diaper, whether or not we can see the designs. I love diapers.com for their customer service, amazingly fast, free shipping (free on orders over $49), AND my boxes of goodies are lugged to my front door by someone else! (BTW if I have convinced you to order from diapers.com ~ use my email address on your first order for $10 off! handcuffed.heart@yahoo.com)
If you're a mom, you know what it means to work hard when you have young kids ~ even if that "work" doesn't bring about anything particularly tangible at the end of the day. If you're a LEO wife with kids (especially those small ones!), not only are you working hard as a mom, you are also working long, odd hours "alone," and that's just the tip of the iceberg for us. For a while now -- actually, since Dallas was born 10 months ago -- I've watched myself get more and more frustrated, "stressed out" (whatever that means), and the biggest, visible change: I'm angry. I have a short fuse. I want my kids to behave, obey, and I want them to do it right away. Sometimes unreasonably so. While obedience is an important trait to groom in children (for it's far reaching effects in many other ways), being unreasonable about expecting their obedience is not helpful. This is not atypical for police parents -- you work all day expecting people to give you what you want, when you want, and comply PERIOD -- so this expectation trickles down to home life as well. I'm not the police parent in our family, but I've definitely been creeping towards the unreasonable end of the spectrum over the last 10 months. I don't remember EVER yelling this much in my entire life, if ever. (I'm the one always telling my husband to pipe down when we're arguing. I don't "do" yelling during fights!) Quite simply, I do not like who I have become as a mom of three.
I've really been struggling with this lately. I miss my old life. I miss being single, wearing my cute, small(er) sized clothes and shoes, working at a job that has a tangible product produced at the end of the day... I miss going to bed and waking up whenever I feel like it. I miss hanging out with my friends and going to fancy restaurants without a bunch of hullabaloo of schedule coordinating and babysitter arrangements. And when I think about how much I dislike who I have become, I miss all these things even more. Then I remember that it wasn't all a bed of roses back then, either!
So what's a girl to do?? While I miss my old life, it doesn't mean I necessarily dislike my current life. My life is challenging now, but they are different challenges than those I experienced "PK" (pre-kids). I'm being required to grow and change and stretch in ways I never was PK. I have three adorable children who worship and love me (yes, I know this will change soon enough).
So I've decided I want to drink the Kool-Aid. I want to be a "yes" woman. What am I talking about, you ask?? The longer my husband is at his department the more officers he sees promote and "drink the Kool-Aid." They become "yes" men (or women) and the things that they formerly railed against, they begin siding with the brass on. What's wrong with me doing the same? Every time my child asks for something, I want to say "yes." I'm slowing relegating Mean Momma to the netherworld and saying YES. Don't misunderstand: I will still be one of the strictest mommas I know; I have my limits. I have boundaries, expectations, and hopefully patience. Being a YES woman is a state of mind. Stuck in line at Costco (like tonight)? It sure went a lot faster because I was playing with and chatting with the three kids and not so incredibly angry (like I wanted to be!) that the checker was incompetent, slow, and chatty with his coworkers. The kids want to eat breakfast in bed? Ok, YES, we will pick ONE DAY this week when you can do that ~ we will plan the (non-messy) menu and look forward to it all week. Everyone's happy! I said yes but I have my limits. :)
I don't want these precious, precious years with my little ones to slip by while I'm mired in anger, impatience, and totally depressed about my "horrible" life. I want to treasure what I have, while I have it. I hope you will join me and say "YES" with me.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
The Ultimate Wedding
I don't know about you, but my dream of an "ultimate wedding" does not include a hospital bed or a recently paralyzed groom.
But that's how it was for Mary Cole and her fiancé, Densey, a Chicago police officer. On May 27, 2009 Densey was paralyzed in a head-on collision while responding to a burglary call. He was in a coma for four weeks, but he & Mary were married in the hospital when he awoke.
Here's where you come in. Like I said, that's not exactly *my* dream of the ultimate wedding, and I don't think it was theirs either. Now they are in competition for Crate and Barrel's Ultimate Wedding and I want them to win! Go vote for them (ok, or you can read about all the couples and vote for any couple you feel are deserving of this truly ultimate wedding).
When you click "vote" you will be asked to create an account. Once you verify your account by clicking on the link in your email, you've voted! Easy Peasy! :) Thank you from the LEO family!
But that's how it was for Mary Cole and her fiancé, Densey, a Chicago police officer. On May 27, 2009 Densey was paralyzed in a head-on collision while responding to a burglary call. He was in a coma for four weeks, but he & Mary were married in the hospital when he awoke.
Here's where you come in. Like I said, that's not exactly *my* dream of the ultimate wedding, and I don't think it was theirs either. Now they are in competition for Crate and Barrel's Ultimate Wedding and I want them to win! Go vote for them (ok, or you can read about all the couples and vote for any couple you feel are deserving of this truly ultimate wedding). When you click "vote" you will be asked to create an account. Once you verify your account by clicking on the link in your email, you've voted! Easy Peasy! :) Thank you from the LEO family!
Friday, March 5, 2010
What shift for you?
I know, don't all fall over because I post more than once in an entire day. It's just been one of those days.
Today I finally got some info about the upcoming shift change at DH's department. I've added a poll so you can vote on what YOU would choose; you can choose more than one, but I assume you'll pick weekdays OR weekends, AND one of the times of day ~ days, swings, or graves (overnights).
We are less than six years into this and already I'm "so over" the whole shift change thing. Interesting to note, I recently heard someone say that only the people who still have a hang up about "X" ever say "I'm so over 'X' " ... and that would be true in this case for me! More appropriately I should say "I'm so fed up" with the whole shift change thing. Every time it feels like playing Russian Roulette, choosing blindly and hoping that whatever shakes out works for us as a family and for my husband as an employee. Things like:
Who's your sgt?
Who else is on your shift?
What is going on at home?
Which kid is doing what?
Is it spring, summer, winter, or fall?
More things that I can't think of right now, but it just seems complicated when it feels like you can "control" your destiny (i.e. choose your shift) when in reality you -- rather, *I* as the stay-at-home Mom -- feel completely out of control and royally screwed no matter which way you look at it.
So I'm wondering, where should I aim when I pull the trigger and make a request one way or the other this time? And can I convince DH?
Today I finally got some info about the upcoming shift change at DH's department. I've added a poll so you can vote on what YOU would choose; you can choose more than one, but I assume you'll pick weekdays OR weekends, AND one of the times of day ~ days, swings, or graves (overnights).
We are less than six years into this and already I'm "so over" the whole shift change thing. Interesting to note, I recently heard someone say that only the people who still have a hang up about "X" ever say "I'm so over 'X' " ... and that would be true in this case for me! More appropriately I should say "I'm so fed up" with the whole shift change thing. Every time it feels like playing Russian Roulette, choosing blindly and hoping that whatever shakes out works for us as a family and for my husband as an employee. Things like:
Who's your sgt?
Who else is on your shift?
What is going on at home?
Which kid is doing what?
Is it spring, summer, winter, or fall?
More things that I can't think of right now, but it just seems complicated when it feels like you can "control" your destiny (i.e. choose your shift) when in reality you -- rather, *I* as the stay-at-home Mom -- feel completely out of control and royally screwed no matter which way you look at it.
So I'm wondering, where should I aim when I pull the trigger and make a request one way or the other this time? And can I convince DH?
Five Question Friday
I found this on CopMama's blog and I wanted to share with you all. Five Question Friday comes from Mama M. at My Little Life.
1. What's your guilty pleasure?
A long, hot MORNING shower. How sad is that? Seriously, it's about the only non-fattening, non-life-threatening thing I do very simply ONLY for myself. I don't get these so much any more as a mom with three kids but when I can, I savor them to the max!
2. What is your favorite TV series?
For a while it has been Grey's Anatomy, but if Southland sticks around it will be a big competition! My guilty pleasure TV series (can I make this up?) are all the "Real Housewife" series on Bravo (except for Atlanta, that one didn't really float my boat). They are like train wrecks -- you know you should stop watching but you just can't make yourself. I was in TV heaven last night with new episodes of Grey's, Real Housewives of Orange Co AND New York!
3. Can you speak any foreign languages?
Yes, I am fluent in Spanish and know a few things in other languages that make me dangerous but not helpful.
4. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
How many pairs I own, or wear, or actually fit?!?! My feet have changed quite a bit over the course of having three kids. I'm only willing to give my shoes away to people who will enjoy them. For some reason the Good Will is a-ok for cast off clothes and household items, but those precious shoes will not do over there. I think it feels like another link to my "previous" life without kids. I had lots of nice, cute shoes but now... not so much. So basically I have way more shoes than my husband would like hanging around.
5. What's your favorite kind of M&M's...peanut, almond, straight up regular, etc.?
Back in the day, your only choices were peanut, regular, and I think around Easter (or was it Christmas?) there was the mint option. I was a plain only girl. Sometimes I'd go for the mint ones, but no peanut, no way, no how. In 8th grade they came out with peanut butter and those were great. Now my taste buds have matured and it all depends on my mood whether I head for plain or (gasp) peanut. :)
1. What's your guilty pleasure?
A long, hot MORNING shower. How sad is that? Seriously, it's about the only non-fattening, non-life-threatening thing I do very simply ONLY for myself. I don't get these so much any more as a mom with three kids but when I can, I savor them to the max!
2. What is your favorite TV series?
For a while it has been Grey's Anatomy, but if Southland sticks around it will be a big competition! My guilty pleasure TV series (can I make this up?) are all the "Real Housewife" series on Bravo (except for Atlanta, that one didn't really float my boat). They are like train wrecks -- you know you should stop watching but you just can't make yourself. I was in TV heaven last night with new episodes of Grey's, Real Housewives of Orange Co AND New York!
3. Can you speak any foreign languages?
Yes, I am fluent in Spanish and know a few things in other languages that make me dangerous but not helpful.
4. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
How many pairs I own, or wear, or actually fit?!?! My feet have changed quite a bit over the course of having three kids. I'm only willing to give my shoes away to people who will enjoy them. For some reason the Good Will is a-ok for cast off clothes and household items, but those precious shoes will not do over there. I think it feels like another link to my "previous" life without kids. I had lots of nice, cute shoes but now... not so much. So basically I have way more shoes than my husband would like hanging around.
5. What's your favorite kind of M&M's...peanut, almond, straight up regular, etc.?
Back in the day, your only choices were peanut, regular, and I think around Easter (or was it Christmas?) there was the mint option. I was a plain only girl. Sometimes I'd go for the mint ones, but no peanut, no way, no how. In 8th grade they came out with peanut butter and those were great. Now my taste buds have matured and it all depends on my mood whether I head for plain or (gasp) peanut. :)
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Thankful Thursday (no whining!)
I had another whiny, poor me post half written and then I decided -- y'all don't want to hear about that! Neither do I, in fact. I realized that today is THURSDAY! Yes, people, that's right! Thankful Thursday. :)
Today I am thankful that...
Today I am thankful that...
- I was able to get antibiotics for Dallas and he is not allergic to them (found out he has an ear infection yesterday while at his well baby checkup!)
- I stocked up at the grocery store yesterday
- Today is a new day
- Husband has a job
- John Piper reminded me that the desert may come before the oasis and it may last a long time (in the case of Joseph, 12 years!)
- Nearly free tickets to the aquarium
- I got my Southland fix last night
- We have an awesome pediatrician
- My friend is pregnant with #3
- The punky skateboarders who were skating where we live didn't attack me yesterday
- Not much "excitement" for DH back to work last night :) Makes ME happy and him unhappy but that's ok!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
what does it mean to be "subpoenaed" ?
Let's take a look at the definition of "subpoena" shall we? (Courtesy of Webster himself.)
"a writ commanding a person designated in it to appear in court under a penalty for failure"
I'm thinking that said "writ" must be given TO the designated person SO THAT he knows he is required to appear in court. I'm just saying, if you are commanding someone, it doesn't do any good to write it down and not give it to 'em, because then in that case you aren't commanding them. You are, well, just writing.
What's the point of this, you ask?
My husband was evidently subpoenaed for a case first thing in the morning tomorrow. He accidentally found out about it because another officer called and asked for a ride. The subpoena came while he was off last week and so he wasn't officially served. Hm. There goes his prime sleep time.
But we'll, er, I'll be happy to have the OT. ;)
"a writ commanding a person designated in it to appear in court under a penalty for failure"
I'm thinking that said "writ" must be given TO the designated person SO THAT he knows he is required to appear in court. I'm just saying, if you are commanding someone, it doesn't do any good to write it down and not give it to 'em, because then in that case you aren't commanding them. You are, well, just writing.
What's the point of this, you ask?
My husband was evidently subpoenaed for a case first thing in the morning tomorrow. He accidentally found out about it because another officer called and asked for a ride. The subpoena came while he was off last week and so he wasn't officially served. Hm. There goes his prime sleep time.
But we'll, er, I'll be happy to have the OT. ;)
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