Sunday, March 29, 2009

Hello, I'm...

...
Well I never quite know what to say to start off a conversation. "Hello, I'm [insert name here]" usually is a good place to start. And how I am connected to you. But here's the trick. I'm super paranoid and private. But I love to write and as you're about to find out, I have a lot to say. I just say it better when I type it instead of, well, saying it!

If I had to guess, I'd guess you made it here because you are the wife, spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, or "special friend" (let's stop now) of some sort of law enforcement officer (LEO). Me too. I married my husband 11 months before he started the police academy, so I've gone through the "Hey, you were normal once and now you're a weird cop!" transition -- which many say is nearly impossible for a relationship to weather. Well that first hellish day of academy was just about five years ago and so far things are going ok. Yes, I would say my husband is different now than he was then, but I didn't marry him with vows that said I would love and cherish him in sickness and in health as long as he never changed. :)

I had big dreams of becoming great buddies with some of the wives of the academy recruits, but that didn't really work out for a number of reasons, some of which were: the academy was a pretty good distance from our house, the academy had a bunch of different agencies participating so there wasn't a big incentive for the spouses to get together, and my husband was a good bit older than most of his classmates so I think he was in a bit of a "different" position. Anyway, I digress.

I then had slightly toned down hopes of getting to know some of his fellow officers or their wives/families once he was off field training (commonly called FTO) but alas, it's been a few years and that really hasn't happened either. The point of all this is to say that I have felt somewhat alone. I have a really unique "job" ~ I'm the wife of a LEO, and it is a job that very few people understand. I have lots of friends who will smile and nod and commiserate, but there is nothing like really wondering if your spouse will come home walking through the door or carried in a box. There's just nothing like it.

I've been so blessed to RANDOMLY (and I capitalize random on purpose!!!) meet and connect with one or two other wives, and it has been a great comfort to me. I realized with the deaths of three Oakland Police Department (CA) sergeants and a motors officer last weekend, I would love to have this outlet. Thanks for reading and coming with me on this journey. Let's see where we end up ~ and I'll tell you a little more about myself next time. Although not too much, I'm married to a cop!! :)