I really appreciated Katie's post this week about putting our hearts on the line. It may be a really common idea, but I had never quite thought of it that way. While our spouses are out there putting their lives on the line for the general citizenry, those of us who send them off put our hearts on the line. It described my feelings and thoughts to a "T".
As my husband's law enforcement career winds down, I get more and more nervous that I'm going to send him off and have something horribly terrible go wrong while he's at work. I've always been a little nervous, but at peace. Now I think, have we come so far to just lose it all to some nutcase, right here at the end? Officer Kenyon Youngstrom, whom Katie talks about in her post, died this week after checking out a dead deer on the side of the road. (A fellow officer initiated a stop, where the suspect pulled over near Officer Youngstrom and eventually took Officer Youngstrom's life. You can read all about it on the various news websites.)
Whenever I send my guy back into the fray after hearing all the details about a line of duty death, I'm a little more nervous. My heart races a little more. I make sure I get an extra kiss or two before he heads out. I repeat my mantra over and over, "The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe." Proverbs 18:10 (NIV 1984) And I try not to eat too much ice cream.
What's your go-to method for calming the fears that find you when you aren't (or are) looking?
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