I know I have been quiet here recently.
Let me tell you, this is the only place it's been quiet. I mentioned we had H1N1 at our house (except for me) and now we have some other mystery something going around. We have approximately 140 square feet per person in this place and nowhere to put anything. (Does that makes sense?) I'm desperately afraid that in my quest to minimize I'm throwing out something I'd desperately want back at some point. (Happened when we got married, whoops.)
The "noisiest" thing (other than three squawking children and all the hullabaloo I mentioned in the previous paragraph) going on is that I'm kind of feeling purposeless and "mission-less". That makes a lot of noise and confusion in my head. I feel like I have my nose to the grindstone washing laundry, washing dishes (although I have hardly been cooking lately so I don't have any idea where the freaking dishes come from!), wiping noses and behinds and if I lift my head up too far then I will have to actually think about what my purpose is. I know, I know, you're going to recommend The Purpose Driven Life by Warren (or whoever that guy is) to me or something but that's not quite what I'm talking about. I feel like I am siting outside my own body watching myself engage in life and I am completely disengaged. I'm sure this is making no sense. It hardly makes any sense to me, which is why I'm trying to type through the confusion at the moment. I was pleading for a nanny the other day and a wise-cracking older friend told me to look in the mirror. It gave me a good chuckle but I had to honestly say -- I don't know who that is that is looking back at me in the mirror any more.... Oh! It must be the nanny then!!
I use the excuse that I'm a single wife of a LEO so I don't have time to [x, y, z]... but I wonder... when the kids are (more) grown, the J-O-B has died down, and I have my "self" back, what then? Will I make it until then?
So, ladies, what are you doing to take care of yourself NOW? Let me learn from you!!
3 hours ago